Unavoidable Pain: Two

Foto0254_aOde to the Two

Ah how loyal they were to me,
I just threw them over without a thought
As if they’d been nothing to me at ll
As if they were just another vice…

It was a last cold winter’s morn in ’13
And I, after 3 days of fever groped for them
I tried to light up that cold dank morn
But nearly fainted away right there!

I found that awful burning in my chest
Was compounded 10 times to infinite!
The taste was like an infernal burning cess-pit
The smell was beyond any description!

I put that last cigarette right out…
Then, weaved my way to my couch
Where I laid myself down as my head spun
Realizing I could no longer smoke!

Oh don’t think it hasn’t been a pain!
For every time I want a ciggy break
I think of smoking but in vain…
I don’t know now what to do with myself.

For though I can light up at any moment,
(I’ve two packs here calling to me each day)
The thought of that spinning sea-sick feeling…
Has ruined the pleasure now for me.

So, I say, why go throught the unavoidable pain
Of learning to overcome nausea once again
I’ll just have to find another mindless passtime
To occupy my hands when I’m reflecting on rhymes.

So, here’s to those loyal friends…I left them
And wonder now what to do with these two packs
Seems so terrible to throw 10 euro into the trash
Maybe I should just burn them in the fireplace…
Yes…’tis more fitting by far!

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Well dear Shainbird...as you know, for some reason Ballads and Odes just don’t click for me, but an Ode I promised you and so I tried to make this an Ode…

Written for Prompt 37: Unavoidable Pain from Mind Love Misery:  This is a second trial for unavoidable pain…in truth, when one stops smoking it can be very painful…but I was already in pain so it became easy. I tried to start smoking again and found it was really painful, I still have a chestful of gunk!

Smells are way off, in fact I’m also finding coffee and some of my favorite foods disgusting…so It would be painful right now to start smoking again.  I’m just going to re-inforce this bit of negativity and accentuate the bother to re-start smoking.  So far it’s worked quite nicely.  I haven’t had a cigarette in 12 days…still early I know, but I’ve decided that I don’t smoke any more.

Now the big problem is what to do when I need that 5 minute break in the middle of writing a poem or story.  I used to get up…go out on the loggia.  Light a cigarette, take like 4 drags off of it.  Put it out and return to my computer.  Strange what 4 drags meant.

23 thoughts on “Unavoidable Pain: Two

  1. I have never smoked personally but I have in recent years discovered I have food allergies (gluten and milk) giving up some of my favorites foods and lets not forget desserts has been painful, expensive and inconvenient. As these foods make me physically ill I can’t really imagine eating them but it would be a lie to say I don’t miss the freedom of a wide open menu and well the taste naturally. I don’t suffer physical withdrawal from not eating these foods as you must but I can relate to having to give up something because it makes you sick.

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    • Yes…it is true that it’s not only “vices” that are painful in giving up, from now on I’ll will consider that I have an allergic intollerance to smoking . There are so many things that create pain in our lives by just removing us from our comfort zones and habits. Thanks for sharing your allergy problems. It must have been difficult giving up those foods…they are just the basis of the food industry! My nephew had a passing lactose allergy…he couldn’t even eat ham as here in Italy there’s lactose in Ham! The no gluten food lines have become a big thing here in Italy over the past 5 years…seems everyone all of a sudden has a gluten intollerance. The very basis of the Italian diet is pasta…

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      • Food is a big comfort for me because I love to eat haha Children can develop lactose intolerance following illness my daughter did as well. There aren’t a lot of options here in Sweden, Swedes are big bread eaters, carb eaters in general really. Lots of desserts too. Gluten is difficult for a lot of people for me aside from obvious digestive issues it causes seizures

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        • Yes, the celiac problem is incredible here in Italy and it just blew up in the last 10 years or so…incredible really. I think food is a comfort not only for you but for many people…that has been part of the creation of this whole new market in Italy…we now have pasta made with corn meal for example and it’s really quite good.

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          • I am so jealous. I love buckwheat noodles but the one place that had them stopped they were my favorite alternative, so I eat rice noodles and some of the gf corn noodles which are good but the specifically gf stuff is rather pricey

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          • I think the noodles market is so big in Italy as I said because pasta means food to most Italians like meat does to the Americans. That was the first thing that came out…first rice noodles, then corn meal, buckwheat now I don’t really know all the kinds. They used to be very expensive (and some brands still are) because they were handled by the dietary (the gf people) companies…not always so any more.

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          • Here’s hoping they lower prices here and bring back my buckwheat noodles haha I eat rice and sweet potatoes as my staple personally but naturally I get cravings for good pasta too

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          • I think it is a matter of demand I guess…here pasta is just so important so it’ logical there would be people running to fill the needs of the market.

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  2. Nice Georgia!, on the ode and giving up! I hope you discover something new and great to take the place of those 4 drags. By the way, the photo is nice. Ironically, it looks like an ad for the cigarettes.

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  3. I gave up smoking January 31st 2006. Later in the year, it got too much for me and I had a couple of cigarettes. The pain though. Ripping through my chest. I had two or three cigarettes then and haven’t touched them since

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