Yesterday, Gary Matthews, better known as Ye Olde Foole, put this up on my post:
living
with
volcanoes from
your childhood, well,
you learn
to
listen-
always
an
awareness of
the slightest shifts,
your breath
kept
shallow.
life
spent
struggling to
stay awake for
that inevitable
next
eruption.
It’s a poem with 11 words per stanza. I’m going to try using the form. and challenge anyone else to do the same!
running
away
slipping along
tumbled down hillsides
getting muddy
isn’t
fun
shouting
bravo!
opera like
at squeaking mice:
that’s enough
highbrow
music
pitter
patter
little feet
slimy spider’s paws
trampling you
tenderly
nightly
Uhm…not much of a poem. The form is harder than one would expect…
She,
Longing
For fulfillment,
Has tried everything
To insure
Daily
Carresses.
But
When
There’s nothing
Left for her
What can
She
Try?
Constant
Hounding
Stalking calls
Until the other
Runs away
Seeking
Peace?
Her
Anxiety,
Drove him
To break up
The affair
And
Left.
A little better…and you, what can you come up with? If you feel inspired, write a post or put your poem in the comments below-
Tomorrow, as today, I’ll be out of town, so I probably won’t be doing much reading or posting. Ciao, Bastet.
At first, I thought it looked simple. Then I saw what you were doing and it’s more of a challenge than I realized. It seems many poem styles are deceptively difficult.
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Yes they really are…I appreciate Ye Olde Foole’s great capacity to concentrate his peoms…probably it’s the years of haiku writing that’s given him an edge.
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Reblogged this on Hey Sweetheart, Get Me Rewrite!.
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Thanks for the reblog.
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I want to give it a try but may have to rest a bit…later…
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Do please rest…good night! 🙂
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How many stanzas must you do…I just did one with 3 stanzas.
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There’s no rule on that, his original poem was 3 stanzas but he didn’t specify…the important thing is the 11 words per stanza.
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Reblogged this on Traces of the Soul and commented:
This looks easier than it is…have a go and post it or put it in the comments of Bastetandsekhmet.
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She had nine days
to unwind
time should
be so kind.
Her mind
racing
could not
sit still.
she kept on
pacing.
A bottle
of little blues
would settle
her down
a little.
Not so great, I think I will try again later…wish I did have some of those little blues…:D
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not too bad for a first go. Can’t say I did much better 🙂 I don’t know what little blues are, presuming something calming, yes?
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It was pretty pitiful but my excuse was my mind was mush…hehe; blues are little blue sleeping pills. I remember at work years ago colleague working the night shift had dropped on his desk. I asked him about it and he said his dad had given him a few so he could sleep duirng the days. My mom had them too. I have a funny story to share about an old boyfriend who took them too…well, not too funny but it is now., later. It’s a glorious sunny day today! Have a good evening where you are…ciao, Bella.
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I’m happy you’ve got a glorious sunny day! Thanks for telling me what little blues are. Here little blues are Viagra and I knew you couldn’t be talking about them! I don’t think you first trial was pitiful…but a first trial, as I said to another reader, the aspect which I found attrative here is the concentration (as in compressing meaning) required to write the poem…like with haiku! I’m sure you can use this form quite easily!
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Thanks hon….no I would not need viagra but maybe it wouldn’t hurt to keep some…um…forget it …lol
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lol…I’ll forget it, if there’s one thing WE don’t nee that’s viagra (ha ha)
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ahahaha…
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Hello Bastet! I am intrigued by this, too. It does seem a bit like haiku, only extended a bit!
Here’s my first try:
If
You
Like me
Will you be
My friend
Forever
Friendly?
If
You
Love me
Will you be
My lover
Forever
Loving?
If
You
Marry me
Will you be
My partner
Never
Parting?
Lol not the greatest result, and kinda corny, but that was fun!
;^)
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lol! I loved this first try. Like with haiku, this form obliges one to get really concentrated, I wouldn’t say it wasy corny actually. I know what you mean, in the sense something often referred to.. In fact we humans are a little obsessed with love and friendship etc. Thanks for giving it a whirl!
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;^) thanks! I loved your mud and mice and spiders too, adorable and fun!
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🙂 I must agree…doesn’t make for ponderous poetry but mud and mice and spiders are fun! 🙂
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