Saturday Night – Shadorma (plus elfje and tilus)


stale beer stink
peanuts and pretzels
honky tonk
football games
men sitting around at night
some shooting the breeze

wife at home worrying
is he drunk

sogged down in strong beer
pay-day blues
another week’s work over
no where else to go

his humor
as he leaves
his pals that night,

swollen ire
inside emptiness
wife beater,
his fist flies
no way else to let off steam
police come too late

Written for Shadorma Photo Prompt # 11

19 thoughts on “Saturday Night – Shadorma (plus elfje and tilus)

  1. Horrible! Not the words, they’re wonderful, but the story described and the fact that it happens far too often in reality…


  2. Ah Georgia, you write such sad realities…when I first read this, I was reminded of Tracy Chapman singing “Behind the Walls”…how I played that album “Fast Car” weeping for so many women. That poem hits home for many…back in the 50’s the police never came for “domestic affairs” 😦 Well done, Georgia!!


    • Thanks Oli, I remember Tracy Chapman’s sons too. I remember as well, and sometimes it’s still true, that the police refused to be bothered with domestic problems. I also remember the fact that so many felt trapped with no where to go. Thanks for reading and sharing.


  3. Most excellent combination of short forms!!! A sad tale well told.
    Is it OK to link your place on my ‘prompts’ page? (I have prompts sites included with my short forms poetry page.) ~Jules


    • Thanks Jules for reading and it’s fine for you to link any of my work or prompts whenever you choose to do so, it would be a privilege! Georgia.


      • Are those your links? Ah… no. From the post I was reading it was ‘guessed’ that the prompt was from you! As the poster had mentioned it was you who had taught them the forms. Which could have also happened 🙂 I shall remove it until such time as you set up a prompt site 🙂

        Thanks for those links though. I will have to check them out.


        • The prompts are from me…but I write for those blogs as well as on my own and on Poet’s Corner as welll, but there I don’t do prompts…and yes, I taught the forms. 🙂


          • The clouds part. 🙂
            I will look into the prompt sites links. At the moment I have a few that I regularly follow plus my own daily space. I have a page for forms on my short verse site – I condensed it to one page. But there so many places to learn from.
            I enjoy learning new forms and combining them in non-traditional ways. Thanks ~Jules


          • 🙂 I too love learning new forms and if you can mix and match them so much the better, but that ususally works best mixing prose and poetry…but inthe case of this poem dividing the shadorma with the elfje and tilus seemed natural.


in shadows light - walking under weeping pines - spring rain

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