Bastet and Sekhmet's Library

Stories, poems and thoughts about things I find interesting!

Haiga Festival – Melancholy – March 19, 2015

Posted on March 19, 2015 by Georgia

sun sets on the lake
the willow weeps her tears
another day gone

I wrote this haiku/haiga several days ago – at first it was intended for ‘weeping willow’, but it seemed so suitable for ‘melancholy’ that I changed my mind .. this is a variation that came to mind as I was typing this:

sunset on the lake
winter willow weeps her tears
as day passes

This post is linked to Carp Diem Haiku Kai’s Haiga Festival for Melancholy

15 thoughts on “Haiga Festival – Melancholy – March 19, 2015”

Tournesol (Clr) on March 19, 2015 at 05:49 said:

I love them both, Georgia! that photo looks like a paiting,really lovely!

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- Bastet on March 19, 2015 at 07:27 said:
  
  Cool … that wasn’t my intention but like the idea! Thanks for the feedback!
  
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Jen on March 19, 2015 at 05:51 said:

What a beautiful photo, Georgia! And it would be very difficult to choose between the two haiku — but the second one is growing better each time I read it.

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- Bastet on March 19, 2015 at 07:28 said:
  
  I think the second one is better actually … I like it better it seems more ‘haikuish’ if I can say such an outlandish thing.
  
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  - Jen on March 19, 2015 at 07:40 said:
    
    Hey, go for it! It’s more haikuish! Haikuey? Haikuniscent?
    Anyway you look at it … I agree 😉
    
    In the first you have three statements; in the second you have phrase/fragment. But in the first, there’s an ache in “another day gone”.
    
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    - Bastet on March 19, 2015 at 07:54 said:
      
      and … the ache has it’s importance as we’re talking melancholy here … good point.
      
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      - Jen on March 19, 2015 at 08:04 said:
        
        That’s why I was so torn at first, you know?
        
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      - Bastet on March 19, 2015 at 08:08 said:
        
        Yes … the second is detached in a way and doesn’t have that ache … fine point indeed … i still like the second better but the first is more suitable for the haiga.
        
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      - Jen on March 19, 2015 at 08:15 said:
        
        Exactly 🙂
        
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suej on March 19, 2015 at 09:22 said:

I agree, the first has the melancholic ‘ache’ of another day gone……

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- Bastet on March 20, 2015 at 08:31 said:
  
  Thanks Sue .. than it’s nearly unanimous! Thanks for adding your voice, much appreciated!
  
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  - suej on March 20, 2015 at 09:00 said:
    
    Glad to be of assistance!
    
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Ye Forest Gypsy on March 19, 2015 at 15:51 said:

The first one has the edge, for sure – much more immediate first line, and the clarity is there – the message is stark. And oh dear oh dear, such sadness, so blue – very effective!

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- Bastet on March 20, 2015 at 08:38 said:
  
  Thanks I think you’re right there it is really more effective .. this is one time when the second thoughts were off base. Thank you for your precious feed-back, it’s much appreciated!
  
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magicalmysticalteacher on March 19, 2015 at 18:10 said:

Now this is truly sad…

Melancholy Place

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