riding down a Venetian water road
rain drops fell from grey clouded skies
and white gulls sailed up high and bold
thunder rumbled somewhere it snowed
(which was a blessing in disguise)
riding down a Venetian water road
grey doves joined the gulls to goad
a wayward cat which growled in angry replies
and white gulls sailed up high and bold
bright kayaks throughout the Lagoon rowed
but in Burano some found this so unwise
riding down a Venetian water road
sights and sounds soon overflowed
birds, boats and people filled my ears and eyes
and white gulls sailed up high and bold
Oh Venice though your cold winds blowed
I loved each of your damp gusty sighs
riding down a Venetian water road
and white gulls sailed up and bold
© G.s.k. ‘15
A villanelle for Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie’s B&P Shadorma and Beyond
How enchanting this photo is!!! when I saw it in my reader I knew I had to read this lovely poem. Bravo, ma chère, quel beau voyage sur les eaux de Venice…wow!!
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Thanks so much Oliana .. I was totally in love with the Venetian canals … I’m glad you liked the photo!
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I wish I was there !!
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ME too …
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Gorgeous! It always seems so easy to get it right when I read someone else’s written it! And written it so well!
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I do so know what you mean … and I often feel exactly the same way … about reading other peoples poetry .. I sigh and say … “oh wow! now why couldn’t I have written it like that!”
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You did a fantastic job on this! I call them Villain Nells because it is just a difficult form, but you did a beauty of poem with this.
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Well .. actually, like with most forms, at least for me, until I’ve got the hang of it they are usually villainous … then once you’ve written a few you say — a ha! and they are no longer so difficult.
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they do get easier but if I don’t have to write in a specific form, I’ll stay with my friendly haiku and free form. 🙂
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lol … I agree about staying with free form and haiku … but sometimes I like to walk in the rapids
early morning
splashing through the rapids
slipping on stones
an inspiring adventure
for a lone old salmon
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And an inspiration this is for this old cat snoozing in the sun!
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lol!
old cat snoozing
annoying swallow chatter
disturbs its dreams
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old cat snoozing
whiskers twitching paws running
dreams of cream better!
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Oh you nailed this one….so smooth and flowing….now I think I am going to have to practise more of these to be as accomplished at them as you. Lovely villanelle. How long did it take you to write this ? It took me 2 hours to write mine and it is still not right:)
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I loved your write and I agree about the villanelle … I love waka, but sometimes the more “meat and bones” genre like kyrielle sonnets and villanelle are so satisfying and yes, they take more time to write without a doubt, but I helped myself out using the techniques learnt writing waka to smooth the villanelle out a bit. Your subject was not a simple one … you done good my dear!
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I enjoyed this escape to the water road less traveled.
When I’ve done this form before…well I just copy and paste the repeated lines to where they should be and then figure out the rest. Thanks for stopping by my piece on the prompt.
There was quite a bit I did not know about May Day.
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That’s something I’ve done as well .. once written the first stanza it then becomes a matter of filling in the empty spaces 😉 About May Day … I learnt a lot about it living here in Europe where it is a rather big event!
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This reads beautifully – smoothly – perfectly!!! And you make it look effortless – great job!!
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LOL … it crazy how these, once done look so effortless is it not! Glad you enjoyed it!
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Very much 🙂
I’ve tried to start mine but am stumbling a bit.
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Ah … to tell the truth, I found it a lot more difficult than I’d remembered it to be … out of practice i suspect!
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Loved this Venetian water road in so musical Vilanell, nice images throughout, the line ‘birds, boats and people filled my ears and eyes’ become so visual in literal meaning… beautifully done!
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Thanks so much Humbird … I’m so happy you enjoyed the villanelle and the journey along Venetian water roads. 🙂
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