tsuki shiro ya hiza ni te o oku yoi no yado
moon rise
holding their hands on their knees
evening at a house
© Basho (Tr. Jane Reichhold)
reflecting on the moon rise
a long past spring evening
half-moon or full
laughing smiles and harmony
a hooty owl
mother in the kitchen
father drinking his rye
commenting moon shine
to pass away the night hours
young lovers smile
thinking of their love’s desire
forbidden for a while
future yet unknown
their passion would blossom
under a full moon
wedding bells pealed in June
now they watch young lovers
under a moon rise
sitting primly on the swing
evening at home
the moon smiles her wisdom
another owl hoots his song
© G.s.k. 15
Today’s episode on Carpe Diem Haiku Kai by Basho is a hokku … the beginning stanza of a renga. Chèvrefeuille to challenge us has requested we write an eight stanza response known as a “soliloquy no renga” … which is what I’ve attempted to do with the series of haiku above – I imagine parents recalling their courtship as they watch their child courting under a moon rise.
this held my attention throughout. So well constructed.
This prompt was a bit like a final exam 🙂 to test what we had learned over this Basho month. Such an enjoyable month.
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Thanks Joanna for the fine compliment … it was a bit of a tall order this one .. hadn’t thought of a final exam, but you might be right there!
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nice recollection of memories…..
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Thanks … and it’s so nice to see you Opie!
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Beautifully done Georgia! I liked the owl especially – there was an owl on my last hike 🙂
You do these so well 🙂
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Really beautiful and so well rounded and full 😉
Definitely fell into the cycle and of it – so simple, yet so powerful – words that can echo like the wise owl’s cry. 😀
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Thanks so much MJ for your great critique! 🙂
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Lovely response to the poem.
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Thanks so much Brenda!
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