Stay by Me – unnamed invented form – January 12, 2016

lilac tree

stay by me
even as the dawn breaks
the sun gives way
to another cold day of rain
stay here between these silken sheets
stay by me

here we’re warm
we can play here ’til noon
we can talk too
listen to my story of trees
stay here between these silken sheets
here we’re warm

let’s sleep on
no reason to get up now
our bodies are warm
we have our spring in winter
stay here between these silken sheets
let’s sleep on

stay by me
here we’re warm
let’s sleep on
[goodbye my love]

G.s.k. ‘16

 

(5) Words: | REASON | BREAK | STAY | GIVE | RAIN |
The Secret Keeper: Weekly Writing Prompt #19

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21 thoughts on “Stay by Me – unnamed invented form – January 12, 2016

    • That would be very cool thanks… Here’s what I did – a three stanza poem – word count 3-5-4-6-6-3 – the first and last line repeat in each poem . the fifth lines are the same throughout the poem and then there’s a four line “conclusion” each of the first lines of the poem in turn and finally a conclusive new fourth line. I’m sure you’d have figured that out by yourself ..I wrote this up for myself to remember. I’d really be pleased if you linked up –

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  1. Mmmmm, j’aime beaucoup!! sensually yummy, cara, love the part especially, play a bit, talk a bit…(clears her throat) forgetting the talking ma chère. Such a beautiful lingering image, cara.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I am impressed with your poem. It was more than just an attempt. Reading through some of the other comments, I agree you should set down this poetic and give it a name. It could be simple or complex, what you call it. Elusive Trope wrote a poem recently called Cascade. It had a similar feel but different. The idea of repetition, unfolding your thoughts and feelings, building up the pulse until your conclusion. Sad or hearts being touched with sweet pain. I love what you did. When you name it, maybe you could share it and I will post the style and directions on my Poetry Page and reference to it under the DOOR. It’s fun to have new challenges and multiple challenges to choose from in which to create with the 5 word prompt. Great going. – jk

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    • I’m really very please with how everyone has been so encouraging about this new form. I’m trying to think of a name for the form … I’m trying the Eco Form (Italian for Echo) but I’m not sure yet … I’m trying it out over at the Poet’s Corner … It’d be great to add to your Poetry Page and it was suggested that I put it up on B&P’s Shadorma and Beyond Challenge. Thanks for the really great comment 🙂

      Like

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