The other day I sent an e-mail to our friend Baldy to see how he’s faring…and it seems he faring fairly well! Outside of a bit of a health problem, he’s still going quite strong in the world of Poetry and had the fine opportunity to read some of his poems at the Worcester Literary Festival!
Of course, I asked him if I could share this with you all…though the sound is a bit shoddy.
This was his reply: “I would be thrilled for you to make a post about my Worcester literary festival appearance. You made me smile today! I have had some lovely responses from loved ones over the video (though many jokes about THE shirt, which I believe is jealousy. Every man should own THE shirt that their wife will not be seen in public with.)
It was wonderful to be a part of it, and a real treat to be in such company, the other members of the Worcester writers’ circle are very talented and most supportive and encouraging of each other (much like the WordPress community)…Their latest anthology ‘You Can’t Be Serious’ was the brainchild for the Worcester Literary Festival event held by our circle this year and Tony Judge (a very funny man and excellent writer who has published two novels that I know of) has apparently done a wonderful job with it. I am excited to get my own copies so I can see and show off my appearances within the pages (this is the twenty-sixth anthology that I have appeared in to date and I received two letters from Forward Poetry yesterday asking permission to publish two more – details to follow).
I believe the two poems ‘Uncle Jemmy’s Wibble’ (which came about from a conversation with my grandmother over my uncle’s childhood imaginary friend and sparked a series of funny ‘arguments’ in poem and letter form between them, a truly magical read that I hope to share one day but must get another look at them and ask their permission. one day… one day…) and ‘Ode to ye Olde water Filter Jug’ (which came about from finding a post-it note on grandmother’s filter jug that read ‘please wipe my bottom’…) appear in the anthology but there was a miscommunication between myself and Mr Judge about the final piece and I think a piece of flash fiction of mine is in there. The misunderstanding was due to the flash fiction and the poem I had intended for the book both sharing the same title. I was delighted either way…”
And he has sent a copy of the poems that were read!
Uncle Jemmy’s Wibble
Wibbles are quite wonderful; they are most remarkable creatures,
They come in such a variety, with many interesting features,
I could not tell you what my Wibble looks like; you’ll say I’m telling lies,
Your Wibble could differ much from mine, but then, that’s no surprise,
Mine could have a smooth chin, whilst Granny’s sports a bright pink beard,
My Wibble wears a shirt and tie, which your Wibble thinks is weird,
Your Wibble’s handsome suit does not quite go with that dress,
But my Wibble’s suit of armour’s spoilt by the tutu, I confess,
Are Wibbles bald or hairy? How big are Wibbles’ teeth?
Yours has a piercing where, you say? Goodness gracious, oh, good grief!
My Wibble has a centre parting in his bottom fluff,
But don’t you tell the neighbour, she says she’s had enough!
After all our Wibbles’ farting and other Wibble-esque sounds,
And after what they did in her knickers drawer (that was clearly out of bounds!),
I’m surprised she hasn’t smacked our Wibbles, that they’re not black and blue,
Especially since they posted all her bras to Timbuktu!
[The Second Poem]
Ode to Ye Old Water Filter
(No Allegory Intended!)
From sink unto side,
You once did roam,
But now, methinks, tis’
Time for a home,
As the years have taken,
A toll quite rotten,
Now that we must help,
To wipe your bottom.
Please believe that with,
The decision, we did wrestle,
As you have served us faithfully,
Oh, trusted vessel,
We will be ever grateful,
We pray you know,
But, alas! Dear filter jug,
To a home you must go!
The Filter Jug’s Reply
Or ‘Grandmother’s Ire
By Dorothy Davis (a.k.a. Dotdot or GG)
You wait until you’re as old as I,
And your poor wet botty, you need to dry,
And your back says “ouch!” when you reach that far,
You may think then, “Oh, how bizarre!”
But according to you, that’s the moment when,
You’re put in a home and never seen again!
[To End With]
Two men discussed my punishment
As I stood in the hall,
“Detention,” Said the teacher,
“And you shall lose your ball.”
The head master and the teacher,
Did quietly confer,
“Don’t be misled,” I smiled at the Head,
“It was only a small window, sir!”
You Can’t Be Serious
Worcester Writers’ Circle
Worcestershire Literary Festival 2013)
It’s been really delightful to hear from our blogging buddy…whom we all wish the best!
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